Menace Mashup: MIISFFL Week 5

Just when you thought separation was about to occur in MIISFFL, just when you thought that JP was about to pull away from the field, just when you thought the Supreme Being would concede the regular season just like the Team formerly known as the Dream in Philadelphia...Week 5 happened. 

And JP got married. 

Not a whole lot of football was watched this weekend at Caputo's Corner, but the games still went on nonetheless.  There were modest totals across the board as we did not see superhuman feats on the offensive side of the football.  The highest score in the league was JUST 130 points.  Nevertheless, we had some very competitive games that came down to the prime time matchups on Sunday and Monday nights, just the way we like it at the Mashup.  Let's get to the recaps.

This was supposed to be a rematch of the 2010 championship game, but it turned out to be one of the ugliest games in MIISFFL history.  Our Supreme Team may not have acted very Supreme, but he didn't have to.  After a season opening win over the 09 Champ, Patrick Small's squad has Kinda Ran into a brick wall.  A paltry 81 points from the Supreme Team was all that was needed to defeat a feeble squad that forgot that you don't get points for starting a defense on a bye week...even if that defense is that of the Ravens.  Can't lateral an intercepted pass if you're on the golf course, can you?  Kent's team took advantage of this fundamental blunder despite wishing he had started a defense on a bye...that's right, Kent's Tennessee Titans DST couldn't score more than that of a team on a bye week (-1)!  What is this league coming to?

"Undefeated" just didn't quite work anymore as the team name for Tom, who took quite the pounding in Week 4, so in an effort to excite his charges, he decided to channel his inner Vince McMahon...

...and became the EXTREME TEAM!  You gotta get angry...you gotta get MEAN!!!  But for Tom, it just wan't mean enough.  Yes, folks, I won only scoring 99 points.  Tom hung his hopes on more Stafford to Megatron on Monday night, but while the Lions held up their end of the Undefeated bargain, Tom fell back into the pack at 3-2.  For my efforts in the win, I fell to the bottom of the Pub Dogs division...nice prize, eh?

KSo had been making some noise in recent weeks, scoring the marquee  upset of the year (at least at the time) by knocking off Kent.  Then he ran into Gaz, who after an 0-3 start has now won 2 in a row, and is very much alive in a wide open Pub Dogs division.  If you remember from last year, the Greene Turtles division seemed to be the one that nobody wanted to win as JP faltered down the stretch, now this year it seems to be the Pub Dogs division, with 5 teams...count 'em, 5... with sub .500 records right now.  Who would've thought that at 2-3, the Never Nudes would be so close to the division lead...they may not need those clothes after all.

Speaking of the Pub Dogs division, lo and behold, the 6th team (Sean) is the only one right now with a winning record at 3-2.  The rookie takes the lead in MIISFFL's version of the NFC West following a close win over Patrick Deegan.  He can thank BenJarvus Green Ellis and his 29 points.  Who knew New England even had running backs on their roster, let along backs who can score lots of fantasy points?  Patrick had Foster and Jennings do their jobs, but pathetic performances from the rest of his peeps was not enough to lift him over Sean, despite not even a single whole point from Eric Decker. 

In the Greene Turtles division, teams know how to win it seems.  Zach took this to heart as he once again gets the high score of the week in an almost 65 point beatdown of Matt.  Zach leads the lead in scoring by 25 points over JP, and over 135 points to the next closest guy.  If it weren't for a 3-point loss in a season-opening week slugfest with JP, Zach would be in command of the league right now.  As it stands, he and JP are tied for the top spot in both the Greene Turtles and the league overall.  Zach is this year's Green Bay Packers despite nary a cheesehead on his roster.  As for Matt, he's left to lick his wounds as he takes his number in the herd at 2-3 in the Pub Dogs. 

Finally, Jeff Newman recently has been in the last recap of the Mashup, but he has very quietly amassed a solid 3-2 record after scoring a key win over JP.  What's that I hear?????.......POP!  Yes, folks, that was the sound of champaign popping, as once again we will not have an undefeated team in MIISFFL.  JP was the last undefeated, and he was left victimized for the first time this week at the hands of Jeff.  Was the kiss of his bride the kiss of death for JP?  After 4 very very strong weeks, JP's quest for perfected ended with a resounding thud...not even cracking 90 points, and if it weren't for Megatron on Monday night, it would have been a lot worse.  In fact, for most of the day Sunday, JP was under 30 points!  Even Aaron Rodgers was MIA for most of the first half Sunday night.  He recovered, but the rest of his team didn't.  Will the married life spell doom for Bo Knows Tecmo?  KSo will be the next test next week.

Questions abound all over the place in MIISFFL...how many of them will be answered in Week 5?  We'll find out when we feature:

Kent-Zach (High scoring vs. High Drama)
Nick-Sean (Top Dog vs. Bottom Feeder)
KSo-JP (KSo licking his chops at a wounded JP?)
Tom-Patrick Small (Extreme Running)
Gaz-Jeff (Jeff makes his living at the bottom)
Patrick Deegan-Matt (Our first rematch of MIISFFL 2011!)

I would like at this time to also formally announce the annual MIISFFL LEAGUE MEETING!  The League Meeting will take place Sunday November 20th at the Greene Turtle in Columbia.  All of MIISFFL will be there, so come out and cheer us on...or not.  Till next week.