Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas from all of us here at the Mashup:
And Happy Kwanzaa
And Happy (belated) Hanukkah
And Happy Holidays
And Seasons Greetings
And Happy Festivus for all you Seinfeld people.
And if I forgot someone's preferred holiday greeting, Happy whatever it is you might be celebrating this year.
It was an exciting year in MIISFFL in 2014, before we get to our final match recap I just want to take a few moments to thank our spectacular sponsors (we have sponsors?):
Caputo's Corner (the best sponsor blog in the business...get ready for 2014!)
The Greene Turtle
Pub Dog Pizza and Drafthouse
Dottie's Trophies and Awards
Yuengling Traditional American Lager (because you should thank them too)
The National Security Agency (because you know they're watching)
Yahoo!
In the spirit of the Christmas/whatever you want it to be season, I got a direct link to St. Nick himself to grant every Christmas wish everyone wants this year.
Wait a sec...THAT'S ME! Here's what I am granting everyone for their fantasy wishes this year.
Kent-A new ego after his old one was bruised and battered in the semifinals.
Sean-Some more fairy dust locked in an airtight seal so he can use it again next year.
Gaz-Clothes...but since that joke has run it's course he gets 3 new attempts at keepers in 2014 since his last 3 didn't pan out.
Jeff-A pair of running shoes since he'll be chasing another title from behind next year.
Zach-A quarterback not named Cam Newton
Dewey-A fresh, brand new package of paper grocery bags, with eye holes cut out and everything.
JP-Framed box scores of Menace Bowls I and III... so he can always take a look at what could have been.
Tom-A ticket commemorating another friendly wager won over Kent.
Andy-Johnnie Walker Red Label...you know you want it.
Patrick-The joy of engraving a new name on the MIISFFL trophy.
Eddie...see below
And who might be that new name Patrick has to engrave? Let's take a look at the match recap of MENACE BOWL V.
Nobody had anybody going on Thursday, so this matchup was decided on Sunday. Since Sean was at a severe handicap in terms of projections, Eddie volunteered to make the championship match a home game for Sean, so he went to Sean's home arena in Washington, DC. Also in attendance was Gaz, who volunteered to be special guest referee, shaking off the cobwebs of the thrashing he took at the hands of Eddie last week. The entire contest was contested on Sunday (except for Vernon Davis...but we'll get to him). In the 1PM block, the QB battle was between Ben the Rapist and Peyton, this year's Fantasy MVP. What did Peyton do? 400 yards, 4 TDs, broke the NFL record for passing TDs in a season. What did Big Ben do? 167 yards, 3 total TDs and 1 pick. Not bad considering that he was doing it in a blizzard in Green Bay...but not bad against Peyton is not good enough. Peyton won that position handily 41-26. At the wide receiver position, Emmanuel Sanders and Antonio Brown were on the receiving end of Big Ben's passes, but a foot injury ended Sanders' day. Advantage Eddie. Pierre Garcon added 28 big ones for Eddie while Sean had to wait for Julian Edelman...who didn't find the end zone despite Baltimore getting their clocks cleaned by New England. At the Running Back position, Sean finally had an advantage as DeAngelo Williams hit paydirt while Shane Vereen had less than 10 yards rushing. However, this advantage had already been rendered moot as Jamaal Charles backed up his 57 last week with 25 more this week. La'Veon Bell could only counter with 18.4. Sean won at the Flex position with Joique Bell, and the kickers were a wash, but Eddie dropped the hammer at 4PM when New England only allowed 1 TD, scored 2 of their own, and racked up 4 sacks and 4 total takeaways to put this thing on ice before Monday night even happened. Sean had a chance with Vernon Davis to win at least 1 more position as Greg Olsen only had 5.5 but to add insult to injury, Vernon didn't even have a catch.
Ladies and gentlemen, in what might be the most complete, dominating fantasy playoff performance of all time, I present to you the WINNER, of Menace Bowl V, and champion of MIISFFL for 2013:
EDWARD CAMPBELL!
Yes, Eddie comes to us from the great (sort of ) state of Virginia, and in his first year, took a chance by not taking any keepers in the draft, and ended up taking a flyer on Peyton Manning in the 3rd round. That ended up being the best pick of the draft as Peyton went on to win Fantasy MVP, and with his first round pick Jamaal Charles combined to make the best 1-2 punch in Fantasy this year. For his efforts, Eddie takes home the MIISFFL trophy and $270 in stone cold cash. He adds another $100 as scoring champion (as voted on by the league membership).
So here are the final payouts for MIISFFL 2013:
Eddie: $380 (Champion, Scoring title, and Week 2 and 3 weeklies)
Sean: $100 (2nd place)
Kent: $15 (Weeks 5, 8, and 14 weeklies)
Gaz: $10 (Weeks 1 and 11 weeklies)
Jeff: $10 (Weeks 4 and 12 weeklies)
Tom: $10 (Weeks 7 and 13 weeklies)
Zach: $10 (Weeks 6 and 9 weeklies)
Patrick: $5 (Week 10 weekly)
Our next league event is the MIISFFL Spring Poker Night, which will also serve as our official trophy presentation and cash awards. Patrick, as per your duty as 2012 champ, you must have Eddie's name engraved on the trophy before the Poker Night and be in attendance to present it to him. If you are unable to attend the Poker Night (like Zach the year before), you may use a proxy to deliver, and I will conduct the presentation. All cash payouts will be delivered at this time as well. You may also use your winnings to count toward your league fee for 2014, which will remain unchanged at $50. Watch your emails as I will be setting a date for this event after the NFL Playoffs conclude.
Once again, congratulations Eddie, 2013 MIISFFL Champion! Until 2014, this is the Menace Mashup. Signing off. Take care, everyone!
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