(Dis)Honorable mentions:
Miami Heat-Plenty of premptive strikes thanks to LeBron's "decision" and all the star power taking their talents down to South Beach.
Boston Celtics-The New England trifecta I guess. They tried to pull it off and they did it. In the words of Kevin Garnett: "ANYTHING IS POSSIIBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLEEEE!!!!!!"
Oakland Raiders-Raider Nation...enough said. The only reason they are not in the list now is because their current run of futility forced most of the bandwagoners to go into hiding, meaning the Raider fans that are left truly are legit.
Washington Capitals-No hockey teams made the top 10, mostly because hockey still has yet to take on a life of its own like football has. However, Alex Ovechkin has taken a franchise offering $10 upper bowl tickets at the Verizon Center to one where the cheapest seat in the house is $75. As Rob has said, NOBODY would be going to these games if it weren't for him.
And yes, I am guilty as charged...at least the Caps are the local team. I at least deserve a little slack on that one.
Pittsburgh Penguins-See analysis for the Caps, except replace Alex Ovechkin with Sidney Crosby and Verizon Center with Mellon Arena/CONSOL Energy Center.
And I am NOT guilty as charged here :-)
Enough of that. Now onto the main course. We now dive into the top 5 bandwagon teams of all time!
The only NBA team to make the official list, the Lake Show is really the only NBA franchise I think that DESPERATELY wants to be a bandwagon team, like it's a badge of honor of something. They play in La La Land, half of their official fan base are Hollywood celebrities (Jack Nicholson's the only one who I feel is legit), and as we all know, whatever Hollywood does, the rest of the country MUST do, so if they like the Lakers, we too must also like the Lakers. Sincere LA basketball fans like the Clippers, but BAH, they're the Clippers. Who cares about the Clippers? The Lakers have money, so they can buy guys like Shaq, Karl Malone, and Phil Jackson, and then they can say "look at us, we're the Lakers! We buy championships while you buy our overpriced Kobe jerseys!" The fact that they have won all these years (5 in the last decade alone) only helps to contribute to the bandwagon following. People love a frontrunner, especially a frontrunner that puts their name in shiny (expensive) lights. "Look at me, I'm important! I'm a Lakers fan!"
I guess any list dealing with bandwagoning would be incomplete if we did not include the Evil Empire. The list actually gets a little tricky when you get this high up because as easy as it is to call fans of these teams frontrunners, you get almost just as significant a portion of the population who absolutely despise teams like the Yankees (and the teams below). So there's somewhat of a balance here. Anyway, the Yankees check in at number 4 for a couple reasons. First, there is the inherent sense of entitlement ("if we don't win (buy?) the World Series every year...our team is an abject failure"). Second, the willingness to lavishly spend on just about anything and the cocky attitude that they have about it ("Damn the luxury tax! We have the money, we'll spend it, and there's nothing you can do to stop us! MWAHAHAHAHA!"). Then, their "fans" feel like their lunch money was taken when they don't win it every year ("Hey kid, that's mine give it back! WAAAAAHHHHH!"). The only reason these guys are not even higher up is because I have found that during the offseason, they kind of keep quiet, giving you a chance to forget about it. As soon as Spring Training starts though...uh oh.
Before I start ranting about Duke fans, I must give props to Coach K. He took USA Basketball back to where it belongs. All those NBA dudes who have no concept of "team" really were trying to run the national squad into the ground, or so it seemed. There was no cohesion at all. He got those guys back on track, and I respect that. I also respect his program. His kids go to school and (usually) stay all 4 years. However, this list is not about the team itself, it's about the bandwagon fans, and my oh my do the Dookies have bandwagon fans. You can always tell a TRUE Duke fan because as soon as you start to give them flack about their FOOTBALL team, they'll find some way to throw it back in your face, or say something about Steve Spurrier. A bandwagon basketball fan (also known as a "Cameron Crazy") will say something along the lines of "Duke football doesn't matter...we're a basketball school." Little do they know that not only does Duke play basketball in the ACC, they also play football, lacrosse, baseball...you get the idea. They play all the sports, kids. I never could understand why people like one sport at a school, and another sport at another school? I guess if you can't afford to go there...nevermind.
Sixburgh (What happens to that if they win 7? Don't answer that) I think has more bandwagon fans in more places than any other sporting franchise in America. The reasons why they are not #1 will become obvious when we get to #1. When I was in Orlando this past December, I went to Miller's Ale House to watch the games on Ticket (Great place by the way on International Drive...not too far from where I was staying at the Convention Center). I saw a small smattering of Redskins fans, but I fully expected to be on my own in that place and for the most part I was. I was my usual obnoxious self during a Skins game, taking my medicine when a Brandon Banks punt return TD was called back on a clip...felt just like the Greene Turtle. Anyway, there was a whole corner of the place overrun with Pittsburgh fans, going bonkers whenever the slightest thing at all happened. I don't even remember who they were playing. I had to ask myself...and I asked on Facebook, "How far away do you have to get from Pittsburgh before you find an establishment where there ISN'T a huge contingent of Steeler fans?" My Steeler-fan friend Kristen (she and I go back a ways) noted that there are Steelers fans' headquarters in Rome. ROME! Do they even know what American football IS in Rome? And their favorite team is the Steelers. Go figure. They are EVERYWHERE!!! It's bad enough in Maryland putting up with the constant back and forth between them and the Ravenators. It's worse when you go to a place expecting to deal with apathetic Bucs and Jags fans, only to be mocked by the local Steelers union. What you guys gonna do when that inevitable 4-12 disaster season comes? It's gonna happen. Prepare yourselves..........
Drumroll please....
The number one bandwagon team of all time...
IS...
THE
America's Team. That's really all you need to hear to understand why these guys are numero uno on our countdown. This team throughout its entire history has resorted to numerous self-aggrandizing measures in terms of marketing, finances, and attitude...even going so far as to manipulate stadium architecture to advance their claim. Remember the stadium with the hole in the roof (both old and new)? That was so that "God could watch America's Team," because we all know that God likes the Cowboys. Give me a break! Tex Schram spent 160 million dollars (that was a LOT in 1970) to advance that purpose. Words don't even begin to describe. And then, of course, the fans...the biggest group of sports-related sheeple the country has ever seen. Why do you like the Cowboys? Have you ever BEEN to Dallas? These are commonly asked questions to the common fellow in a Tony Romo jersey. 9 times out of 10, the answer to the second question is no and the answer to the first question is "because they are America's Team" (that or because they hate the Redskins, but that's usually just in the DC area). Name 5 guys on the Cowboys usually comes next. Most will say Tony Romo, maybe Miles Austin, then they stammer and say something like...Emmitt Smith. Don't even bother asking questions like "Do you know who Clint Longley is?" or "Where did the Cowboys play before Texas Stadium" (isn't that where they play now? DUHHH!) or even "How many Super Bowls have they won?" (3 right? DUH!). I could give you a more comprehensive history of the Dallas Cowboys franchise than any randomly selected "Cowboys fan" wearing the jersey number of your choice. Ask me any question about the Cowboys and I'll probably know the answer. Is that a bad thing that I know so much about the Cowboys? I don't know. Know thy enemy I guess. But I know more about the history of that franchise than the average Cowboys fan...AND I HATE THAT TEAM!!! Anyway, I'm done. Hail to the Redskins!
There you have it: one man's humble opinion as to the top 10 bandwagon jumping teams of all time. Please please please don't hesitate to share with me your own lists. I look forward to reading your comments. Keep it tuned here to Caputo's Corner for more lists, previews, reviews, and for our "exclusive" Super Bowl week coverage!
One thing that is true about Yankee fans, and this is actually an argument against putting them in the top 5 is that their fans absolutely despise the bandwagoneers.
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ReplyDeleteI tend to agree with the teams and the order they are arranged. It's nice to read someone who has sports intelligence and common sense. I would say this though. Their are plenty of bandwagon Steeler fans; however, with decline of the steel and coal industry, there have been many western PA natives to leave the area in search of different kinds of work. Thus, they bring their Steeler roots with them. So I tend to believe most Steelers fans living away from Pittsburgh have Western PA, or northern West Virginia roots. Both sets of grandparents did this in my family. But they did it before the NFL was TV popular. If they waited 15 years to move, I bet I too would be a Steelers fan because my parents would have grown up in Steeler Country.
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